Rat Girl
I knew this day would come: the day when someone would push the ‘I hate rats’ thing one step too far. And that day was today–
First some history: I got my first rat when I was ten. She was called ‘Miranda Jessie’ (I am a girl and at the time would only consider having a girl rat, since at this age boys were twice as sinister as they are now—I am now 24). Miranda Jessie was one hell of a rat as far as rats go. She was kind, and loving, and decidedly un-rat-like.
Now back to today:
Walking behind a couple at the train station, I overheard their conversation. The couple were business vampires—the woman had the annoying luxury beach towel skin that only comes from spending vast sums of money—and were pointing to the train-tracks were a rat was scurrying. Immediately I became possessive of the poor little thing. So when the lady said, “they should all be gassed!” I flipped out.
“Excuse me?” I said, “what’s he ever done to you?”
They both looked confused. Then the man laughed, shook his head and said, “so how do you know he’s a he?”
I then went on to school them both on how one goes about sexing a rat. By the end of my little speech, which covered everything, including how rats are far less dangerous and disease carrying than the majority of men out on a Friday night, the man was stunned in to silence and the lady had shut up fully. So here’s what I say: stand up for your cause. Because not everything is bad just because people say so!